Via McSweeney's: a police report on the robbery of three liberal arts graduates:
Perp Two then informed Mr. Wilson-Stern, Mr. Goldstein and Mr. Miller that their "white asses" should listen up and that he and Perp One and Perp Three were going to rob the house and would soon be gone. Mr. Wilson-Stern informed Perp Two that he is, in fact, 1/64th Cherokee and asked whether Perp Two had read Kyama Sozuki's article on race as a social construct in The Stanford Sociology Review.
Perp Three then demanded to know where Mr. Wilson-Stern, Mr. Miller and Mr. Goldstein kept their valuables. Mr. Wilson-Stern replied that his MacBook Pro was in his backpack under the living room table. Mr. Goldstein replied that his laptop and iPod Touch were on his desk upstairs. Mr. Miller replied that his signed copy of Susan Sontag's On Photography was laying on the credenza next to the tanzu.
Comments